“Alone doesn’t always mean lonely. Relationship doesn’t always mean happy. Being alone will never cause as much loneliness as being in the wrong relationship.”
-Unknown
Loneliness doesn’t necessarily equate to being alone, and being in a relationship does not automatically guarantee happiness.
Have you ever been in a crowded room and still felt lonely? If so, you are not alone. (See what I did there…)
It is possible to find fulfillment, contentment, and joy, in solitude. You can choose to be alone and not feel sad or isolated. Being alone does not always have to be negative. Where you place your focus and attention is where your energy will flow.
Simply being in a relationship does not guarantee that you will be fulfilled or content.
Have you ever been in a crowded room and still felt lonely? If so, you are not alone. (See what I did there…)
It is possible to find fulfillment, contentment, and joy, in solitude. You can choose to be alone and not feel sad or isolated. Being alone does not always have to be negative. Where you place your focus and attention is where your energy will flow.
In fact, being in the wrong relationship, where there is a lack of compatibility, love, or emotional fulfillment, can actually result in more loneliness and unhappiness than being alone. Our system which is wired to keep us safe will use the excuse of not wanting to be alone to keep us in a relationship that no longer serves us because it is familiar and “safe”.
To our system, safe = same and change=danger.
Your system has one job, keep you safe. So it will do everything in it’s power to keep you from changing.
Which is why even when relationships are challenging, unfulfilling, or even detrimental to one’s well-being, we stay for fear of being alone. But, simply being in a relationship does not guarantee happiness.
Being Alone and Fulfilled During and After Divorce
Being alone and having a meaningful and fulfilling relationship with yourself is sometimes better than being in a relationship where you feel unloved, unsupported, or unappreciated. When you are on your own, you can be your authentic self without any pretense or mask. You can fully express your thoughts, feelings, and desires without any fear of judgment.
Being in the wrong relationship, where there is a lack of compatibility, love, or emotional fulfillment, can actually result in more loneliness and unhappiness than being alone.
The wrong relationship requires you to constantly pretend to be someone you are not. The energy required to maintain the charade is emotionally exhausting and isolating. Which often leads to a deeper sense of loneliness.
Feeling emotionally disconnected and unfulfilled can result in a sense of loneliness, despite being in a partnership. You become stifled and stagnant, feeling unfulfilled and trapped, and intensifying feelings of loneliness.
Self-Discovery, Growth & Freedom
When you are on our own you have the opportunity for self-discovery, self-growth, and self-improvement. You have the freedom and space to explore your passions, interests, and dreams. True happiness comes from self-awareness, intentional choices, and finding meaningful connections. Staying in a relationship out of fear of being lonely or because of societal expectations often leads to unhappiness and discontent.
Remember, being alone does not automatically mean being lonely, and being in a relationship does not guarantee happiness. By focusing on fostering genuine connections and nurturing our own personal growth, we can avoid the trap of unfulfilling relationships and the misery they can bring. Choose the path that leads to a life of authenticity, joy, and true fulfillment.
How to Overcome Loneliness with a Divorce Coach
Combining 30+ years of legal wisdom with strategy, nervous system regulation, mindset coaching, subconscious trauma healing and energetics, I empower you to embrace the opportunity that the divorce experience delivers for growth and transformation. l will guide and support you in envisioning, and ultimately creating, a future filled with limitless possibility and freedom.
